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Pardew clutches at straws as race to avoid drop hots up

Can we play you every week?   
This is the thumb which will keep us in the Premiership

New Charlton manager Alan Pardew today spoke of his strategy to get the struggling South East London outfit to avoid relegation from the Premiership. Speaking to assembled journalists at a club press conference, the former West Ham boss indicated that there was a range of factors which he would be utilising to aid the Addick’s bid for survival.

“The message I need to send is that the stadium will need to help us,” said Pardew in reference to the abhorrent nature of the team’s recent home performances. Charlton grounds men were unavailable to confirm that Pardew had met with them to discuss sloping the pitch so the ball naturally rolls towards the opponent’s net.

A further possibility involves the deployment of former boss Les Reed to haunt the ground, scaring opponents into the sort of lacklustre performances that would ensure a more even match day contest.

An optimistic Pardew, meanwhile, also took the time to hit out at those who might question his belief in the job at hand. “I can only be critical of them [the players] once they are under me,” he said, akin perhaps to an overexcited un-housetrained dog in need of a wee. Nonetheless, Pardew has presumably instilled a significant amount of confidence amongst the swathes of already downbeat Charlton fans.

Following Pardew’s positive start to his new role, which has seen Charlton gain 4 points from 6, there are already signs that he may yet be able to dig the club out of trouble. His first game in charge, a crucial home encounter with Fulham, was billed as a must win match.

Managing to avoid another drubbing proved to be the more attainable target. “This weekend is a good weekend to pick up points,” permanently angry Fulham manager Chris Coleman cryptically claimed. After they could only manage a fortunate draw, managers may begin to place more respect on the changing fortunes of a club in transition from the brave side which narrowly lost to the giants of league two Wycombe in the cup to ones genuinely capable of avoiding cricket scores week in week out.

Quotes decanted from original BBC Sport article, which can be seen here.