Ill-informed pub conversations
As we all know, the pub is the traditional place for
musing on the hot topics of the week, the celestial meeting point where all
the burning issues can be discussed, be it politics, sports, culture,
current affairs or just celebrity brain factor extreme island (or whatever
it is).
In many ways it is that great mainstay of the masses. From the early days
when Shakespeare used to chug down the ales while lambasting all in his wake
with his intellectual stammering, to today’s ceremonial drunken football
arguments usually set directly below a 42” plasma screen television
projecting vast images of the legendary likes of Keys, Linekar, and to a far
lesser extent Hoddle or Redknapp.
But it’s not just from the all seeing screen that we hear, from nearby
tables or bar stalls, absolute total uninformed, ignorant gibberish.
Everyone, it seems, is the best England manager, the best foreign minister
or in some of the most unpleasant cases, even the best Benito Mussolini.
Sometimes though they are just funny to listen to though, jah?
Punter 1: So this is supposed to be some sort of modern
musician is it? He won’t amount to anything
Punter 2: I don’t like this either. He just rips off Mozart.
Punter 1: Exactly
Punter 2: And he probably isn’t even deaf!
Punter 1: Mozart were much better, they basically invented
classical music. Bands like Tchaikovsky just rehash the old formula
Punter 2: I liked the Four Seasons, but their second album was
shit. I bought it after I heard the single but the rest of the album just
sounds the same.
Punter 1: I don’t think I’ve heard the album but I liked the
singles. Their new one is bollocks though, yeah.
Punter 1: It’s just him isn’t it?
Punter 2: Well it’s him but he doesn’t write his own music.
He’s like Sting or someone.
Punter 1: I see. Same again mate?
Punter 2: Yeah, I’ll have another blended sea-lion and a bag
of cactus rinds mate.